Today I am tired and I am eating chocolate and taking naps. What is wearing is that love can solve it all, but we haven’t figured out how to set love free so the healing can begin. Everyone I know needs to be healed and everyone I know needs to be loved. You simply cannot separate the two.
I cannot begin to meet you where you are and reduce your grief. I cannot find that elusive job, unravel the past injuries, or return the vigor of youth. I cannot right the wrongs thrust upon others… born of your own scars. I cannot talk you into believing in your own beauty or the amazing measure of grace held out before you.
But today, in between the chocolate and the naps… I am here and I am loving you. It’s all that I know to do. It’s my prayer over and over and over again…because I feel you calling out to God and the world and anyone who might listen…and still there is injury, still there is lacking, still there is pain. And I know what lost feels like. I know what it feels to ask for help and help doesn’t come… at least not in the way we think we need. And I am so sad that life tears at us this way and that we sometimes rise up and sometimes just get knocked down again.
It’s really crummy how we each have so much to give and how we are each filled with so much light… but circumstances snatch and blow and before we know it… we have forgotten our brilliancy and worth. I want you to know that I understand these things, because I like to speak of hope and goodness and endless possibilities and sometimes you just can’t hear these thoughts. Sometimes we just have to say that stinky poo is stinky, stinky poo and there’s not much good about it.
But once we have named it, once we have acknowledged the ineptitudes of life and the unexpected harshnesses that leave us utterly speechless, we are still housed in this human body all covered in mysterious love. And we can follow the tiny threads that will teach us something new and lead us toward something new. It rarely feels like we will make it or that we are even worthy of something better. It’s just that we are worthy and until we can remember, it is good to know that there are these caring little spirits in the world who take times outs to eat chocolate and take naps as a means of standing in the gap on our behalf. When all else fails… I hope you can trust that.
I cannot begin to meet you where you are and reduce your grief. I cannot find that elusive job, unravel the past injuries, or return the vigor of youth. I cannot right the wrongs thrust upon others… born of your own scars. I cannot talk you into believing in your own beauty or the amazing measure of grace held out before you.
But today, in between the chocolate and the naps… I am here and I am loving you. It’s all that I know to do. It’s my prayer over and over and over again…because I feel you calling out to God and the world and anyone who might listen…and still there is injury, still there is lacking, still there is pain. And I know what lost feels like. I know what it feels to ask for help and help doesn’t come… at least not in the way we think we need. And I am so sad that life tears at us this way and that we sometimes rise up and sometimes just get knocked down again.
It’s really crummy how we each have so much to give and how we are each filled with so much light… but circumstances snatch and blow and before we know it… we have forgotten our brilliancy and worth. I want you to know that I understand these things, because I like to speak of hope and goodness and endless possibilities and sometimes you just can’t hear these thoughts. Sometimes we just have to say that stinky poo is stinky, stinky poo and there’s not much good about it.
But once we have named it, once we have acknowledged the ineptitudes of life and the unexpected harshnesses that leave us utterly speechless, we are still housed in this human body all covered in mysterious love. And we can follow the tiny threads that will teach us something new and lead us toward something new. It rarely feels like we will make it or that we are even worthy of something better. It’s just that we are worthy and until we can remember, it is good to know that there are these caring little spirits in the world who take times outs to eat chocolate and take naps as a means of standing in the gap on our behalf. When all else fails… I hope you can trust that.
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