So for some time now, I have been talking about how the world is on a strange tilt. We all seem to be carrying
burdens, hardships, worries, stress and strain like we never have imagined. At every turn, there is another person
who is just trying to find a way to walk upright without falling over from not only the weight of it all... but from the tiltedness of the world. We simply cannot walk normally these days… nor can we sleep normally or eat or pray or exist normally. I recently told my mom in one of our heart to hearts… that sometimes I just feel like my whole head will explode if I must stand witness to one more broken spirit.
Well, today, my head did not explode, but I just couldn’t stand upright anymore. Today, I literally hit the
pavement. One moment I was rushing to the next event, and in the next moment I could feel myself falling and
everything in me trying so hard to catch myself. But there was no stopping this crashing to the ground. A very hard crash on cement. I’ve never had the wind knocked out of me until today, but I totally felt the pain of this landing. Momentarily, I couldn’t get up… even as this kind woman stood over me asking if I were alright. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t breathe. And then… the pain eased and she stood there with me until I felt I could rise… and then… she held out her hand to me and helped me up.
Soon afterwards, I went on about my business. I went to the store. I checked my mail. I kept my hair
appointment. But as I was finally driving home, I had a big cry.
It’s always true in my life… it takes something physically happening to my body to rattle me into a new awareness. Oh… I wasn’t kidding about this tilted thing. I’ve been walking around at this bizarre angle for months and simply accepting it as my new norm. But it’s not normal, and today smashing into the concrete reminded me that balance is good, that we are not called to bear the weight of the world, and that we
must pay attention to, we must tend, our own souls or we will go crashing down.
I’m thinking it’s time to decompress, to slow the pace, to allow our souls some fallow time… time in which they may wander in what is glorious and whole, quiet and resilient. If you can feel a fall coming, if your tilt has you suspended closer to the ground than the sky… then trust me as your bruised predecessor when I say, “Pay attention to what you carry before it knocks you down.”
burdens, hardships, worries, stress and strain like we never have imagined. At every turn, there is another person
who is just trying to find a way to walk upright without falling over from not only the weight of it all... but from the tiltedness of the world. We simply cannot walk normally these days… nor can we sleep normally or eat or pray or exist normally. I recently told my mom in one of our heart to hearts… that sometimes I just feel like my whole head will explode if I must stand witness to one more broken spirit.
Well, today, my head did not explode, but I just couldn’t stand upright anymore. Today, I literally hit the
pavement. One moment I was rushing to the next event, and in the next moment I could feel myself falling and
everything in me trying so hard to catch myself. But there was no stopping this crashing to the ground. A very hard crash on cement. I’ve never had the wind knocked out of me until today, but I totally felt the pain of this landing. Momentarily, I couldn’t get up… even as this kind woman stood over me asking if I were alright. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t breathe. And then… the pain eased and she stood there with me until I felt I could rise… and then… she held out her hand to me and helped me up.
Soon afterwards, I went on about my business. I went to the store. I checked my mail. I kept my hair
appointment. But as I was finally driving home, I had a big cry.
It’s always true in my life… it takes something physically happening to my body to rattle me into a new awareness. Oh… I wasn’t kidding about this tilted thing. I’ve been walking around at this bizarre angle for months and simply accepting it as my new norm. But it’s not normal, and today smashing into the concrete reminded me that balance is good, that we are not called to bear the weight of the world, and that we
must pay attention to, we must tend, our own souls or we will go crashing down.
I’m thinking it’s time to decompress, to slow the pace, to allow our souls some fallow time… time in which they may wander in what is glorious and whole, quiet and resilient. If you can feel a fall coming, if your tilt has you suspended closer to the ground than the sky… then trust me as your bruised predecessor when I say, “Pay attention to what you carry before it knocks you down.”
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