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Winter Seeds

1/16/2011

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As much as I try to make this an outward journey, over and over again it is inward.  Isn't it amazing once we find this understanding (even in fleeting moments) that somehow we can truly believe everything will 'come round right'?  I'm trying to understand how it is that we step over into these spaces of clarity, and how, when in the midst of so much darkness and struggle, we can't simply decide to be enlightened?

Remember those days of grief, of mourning?  You wake from sleep and briefly life feels normal until your brain nudges you to remember your loved one is gone.  Morning after morning you wake to this routine until one day something gives and the tears let up.  That deep, deep grip finally lets go, and we are offered an inner freedom.  What yields?  How can we grasp the bridge between our sorrow and our joy?

All I know is that we can be whole in the midst of grief and depression by attending to what is here.  We may not be able to feel joy or hope or happiness, but we can pay attention.  We can allow the healing words and images and voices to take root inside.  I say this as one who yearns to be a vessel of healing in this world.  I say this as one who has lost her way numerous times in this life.  And as I flounder at times as to what to say to others in the midst of darkness, I realize I must never hesitate to hold out hope and love and beauty as tiny seeds that will blossom new life in time.  I must never hesititate to acknowledge the pitch of night knowing that it is tending the light of day.

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    Kathy Guisewite

    "To be about there
      first attend to what is here
      everything connects."  KFG

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